I needed brain fuel this mornin', so I stopped by to see Talib. I enjoy taunting him a little too much, maybe. Well he fought back today via my own stupidity.
I head back to the cooler for a Monster Java and said, "How's the coffee Talib?" "Ooh, very good n fresh sir." So, I put the can back and went for the hot stuff. I'll be damned if it wasn't the worst in our long history... The hell was I thinkin? I know he's just been waiting for me to slip. Perfecting his deadly recipe in hope I would return. I may actually die from the one or two drinks I choked down. Goodbye cruel world...
Showing posts with label Coffee Terrorist. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Coffee Terrorist. Show all posts
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Monday, August 31, 2009
The coffee terrorist nearly in tears
Little back ground for the newbies:
Since I started my medical practice in Waco, I have stopped in the same little Iranian run gas station every mornin' for coffee. The owner, Danny, makes great coffee and is just the nicest guy. Always made for the start of a good day when Danny was in the store and that's why I went there. Now Danny has a brother, Talib. Talib is not kind. In fact, he has those eyes that say, "I will set you a blaze right now, infidel!" when I would walk in the store. When Talib was working in the mornin', the coffee was horrible. Anthrax for powdered creamer? Cyanide in the sugar? Something he was doing different from Danny was trying to kill me. So I call Talib, "The Coffee Terrorist". We've had many a Dose inspired by Talib and his killer coffee.
Now on with the current events:
If you don't know, I had to swear off my mornin' coffee for my diet. So I haven't been in my favorite gas station in weeks, at least not in the mornin'. I pull in this mornin' cuz....well cuz it's a Monday mornin', extra early, I'm draggin' ass, and I need a jolt of "fake-ass morning person" in a cup! Guess who's workin'? Talib! I say to myself, "I'm not about to ruin my diet cheating moment with his sludge..." So I go back to the cooler and grab a Monster Java, cuz with that I at least know what I'm getting. I get to the counter and Talib says, "No real coffee today?" I reply, "Not today Talib... I gotta get this choked down fast and get to a meeting, and your coffee is too hot for that trick." He must have seen me pull in, ran to the coffee to throw every deadly thing he's got at me, and now I've ruined his evil plot to kill me with my new addiction, coffee in a can. I could almost hear the tears of defeat in his voice as he muttered his canned, "Have a pleasant day sir" at me, as I exited.
Since I started my medical practice in Waco, I have stopped in the same little Iranian run gas station every mornin' for coffee. The owner, Danny, makes great coffee and is just the nicest guy. Always made for the start of a good day when Danny was in the store and that's why I went there. Now Danny has a brother, Talib. Talib is not kind. In fact, he has those eyes that say, "I will set you a blaze right now, infidel!" when I would walk in the store. When Talib was working in the mornin', the coffee was horrible. Anthrax for powdered creamer? Cyanide in the sugar? Something he was doing different from Danny was trying to kill me. So I call Talib, "The Coffee Terrorist". We've had many a Dose inspired by Talib and his killer coffee.
Now on with the current events:
If you don't know, I had to swear off my mornin' coffee for my diet. So I haven't been in my favorite gas station in weeks, at least not in the mornin'. I pull in this mornin' cuz....well cuz it's a Monday mornin', extra early, I'm draggin' ass, and I need a jolt of "fake-ass morning person" in a cup! Guess who's workin'? Talib! I say to myself, "I'm not about to ruin my diet cheating moment with his sludge..." So I go back to the cooler and grab a Monster Java, cuz with that I at least know what I'm getting. I get to the counter and Talib says, "No real coffee today?" I reply, "Not today Talib... I gotta get this choked down fast and get to a meeting, and your coffee is too hot for that trick." He must have seen me pull in, ran to the coffee to throw every deadly thing he's got at me, and now I've ruined his evil plot to kill me with my new addiction, coffee in a can. I could almost hear the tears of defeat in his voice as he muttered his canned, "Have a pleasant day sir" at me, as I exited.
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